Going Gray Gracefully

Or, "It's Great to be Gray!" Well, at least it used to be, back when the alternative was death.

Earlier this week I was in the orthodontist's office with Edmund (and when I say "earlier" I mean "earlier." It was 7:30 in the morning.) As I was sitting in the waiting room, trying to pretend the instant chai in the orthodontist's office was as good as a Starbuck's Chai Latte, and wondering if I should pick up and read the skanky magazines that shrieked, "Brad texts away while Angelina has torrid affair with cell phone salesman," and "Octomom shows off sexy new bod," or just get out the knitting I brought with me, I couldn't help but overhear the three women talking behind the receptionist's desk.

"Women should never go gray. My mom is 79 and she only has a touch of gray. Whenever I see any gray hairs, I'll pull them out. If I get more, I'll definitely cover it up."

"Did you see that woman? She was too young to be gray! She had two young children. And she wasn't even wearing any make-up!"

"My husband would never stand for that. He told me so."

"Men look distinguished when they're gray. Women just look haggard."

I tried to sink into my chair without spilling my overly sweet and chemically enhanced faux chai, thinking how stupid of me to not put on any make-up this morning before our early morning trip to the tooth-straightening guy. But the longer I sat there listening to their catty remarks about other women, the more I thought this was unfair.

It's unfair that men should be allowed to go gray, nay, encouraged to go gray, for that added look of distinguishment, a la George Clooney, while women are told their looks must be perpetually youthful and glowing, otherwise they are fodder for office gossip and snide remarks.

Even some Catholic ladies are getting into the spirit of "looking good," some positing that it is the duty of the wife to look lovely for her husband after he's been slaving away at work all day. There are Purity Fashion Shows, which are supposed to promote modesty, but I think they sometimes can promote the importance of outward beauty so much that some girls may feel intimidated. Not everyone can look like a runway model, but that is the sort of look most girls crave and society reinforces.

I believe true beauty radiates from the inside. Just think of someone you know and love who might not meet all the world's requirements to be considered "beautiful." But you see that person and you see beauty, right? To be truly beautiful, we need to be at peace with who we are; be "comfortable in our own skin," as some might say. Then we need to love and accept others. I think that is the big key here. Mother Teresa wasn't ever going to make the top 100 list of the Most Beautiful People in the World, yet she was beautiful. She was beautiful from the inside out. Beauty radiated from her being and people responded to that. People flocked to her because they saw her beauty--which sprang from her Love. Because she loved, she was beautiful.

I don't know if Mother Teresa had gray hair or not. But does anyone really care? I would rather have a dose of her beauty than a lifetime supply of hair coloring at the best salon in town.

Daily Conversion

The conversion on the way to Damascus, by Caravaggio.

"Conversion means a willingness to see the truth of things and conform one's conduct to it." ~A. Sertillanges.

Today is the Feast of the Conversion of Saint Paul, Apostle.

The feast day and the above quote, which I read in today's Magnificat, got me thinking about my own conversion story and my daily conversion. It's not enough to say "I am a Christian," but as a follower of Christ, I am compelled to daily turn my thoughts and actions toward God.

Boy, do I mess up. Sometimes I feel as if I'm standing outside myself listening to (me) the angry mom telling kids to hurry up and get your shoes and coats on because we're late again and why is your room so messy and don't you kids know how hard I work to feed and clothe you and this is the thanks I get?

It can get pretty ugly. I like the above definition of conversion as the seeking of Truth and conforming one's conduct to that Truth. And the truth is that people are way more important than things or being late or having a messy house. And how often I forget that little truth.

But it gets better.

The Truth sometimes means we have to radically change our lives. Like St. Paul had to do when he got knocked of his horse by the blinding light (which indeed, left him temporarily blinded) and he heard a voice commanding him to change his life. Up until this point we can assume that Saul of Tarsus (which was his name before the Big Life Change) thought he was doing the Lord's work. He was going town to town arresting those rowdy Christians who were making life so difficult for ordinary Jews. Saul not only had to change his name and his occupation, but according to the story in Acts 9:1-22, he was was shown by God "...what he will have to suffer for [God's] name."

Human beings are unique among living creatures in that we rationalize and reason and we alone have the capacity and the need to seek the Truth. Some Christian's refer to that need for Truth as the "God-shaped vacuum inside each one of us." We try to fill it with things to satisfy that need, often ignorantly assuming we can satisfy that need, which was designed to be satisfied by God alone. We ache and long for acceptance, for wealth, for status, for friendship or for love, but God alone can satisfy that longing.

Last Friday night, my husband and I went to a kick-off meeting for a marriage group at our parish. I'm always a bit squeamish about those sorts of things to begin with, since I really like to stay inside my comfort zone and I'm naturally an introvert. We had to sit at a large table with three other couples whom we didn't know and talk to them about marriage...a rather intimate topic for strangers to discuss, I thought.

But over the course of the evening's discussions, I began to realize that successful marriages depend upon daily conversations and daily conversions of the spouses to one another and to God. Anyone who says "my marriage is great," but doesn't keep working at it will soon find him or herself in a rocky relationship.

The same must hold true with our relationship to God. If God is truly our Creator and our Love, then we must daily renew that relationship with Him and convert all of our being toward Him, who is the source of all Love.

Twitter is stealing my life!

The best way to learn a new skill is to jump in with both feet and just give it a try! Or so I thought with some of the new technology that keeps flirting with my time.

Not too very long ago I signed up with Twitter. Not a big deal, the sign up takes just a couple of minutes. I had one friend already on Twitter. From blogs I found a few more friends.

Then I discovered Tweet Catholic. From that list I found some really cool Catholics that I started following. One such guy, is Paul Camarata, his bio states, "A family man, neurosurgeon, and Catholic podcaster." He sounded way too cool, so I decided to follow him. He runs an amazing website, The Saint Cast, which has podcasts about the saints and a really awesome youtube video called "The Saint Song."


Once I started adding a bunch of folks from that list, many of them started following me! The busy rambling of everyone's Tweets looked incomprehensible at first. Then I began to see that some of them were responding to other's Tweets, signified by the @ at the beginning of the Tweet.

Not sure if anyone is actually reading your Tweets? I found out if you ask a question, you can often get an answer, to which the polite Tweeter responds with a "Thank you!"

Still, there are confusing combinations of letters and symbols, and I noticed the hash symbol, #, appearing quite frequently before the letters "tcot." What could that mean? Some secret language? I Tweeted and asked the question and was told it means "top conservatives on Twitter." They also have their own list, which I scanned for people I'd either heard of or people who sounded interesting. I preferred to find people with whom I had something in common, so I looked for those who listed "Catholic," "homeschooler," "stay at home mom," "humor," "veteran." I found some really interesting people there too!

I tried to resist the urge to follow tons of celebrities that I really had nothing in common with, though I did break down and follow Tony Hawk. Don't ask me why. I don't skateboard and none of my kids do either. I've never played any of his video games or worn any of his clothes. (Does he design clothes?) But when I read his bio: "...professional skateboarder, dad, videogame character, husband, ceo, kid chauffeur," I thought he sounded like a fun guy to follow. I especially liked the part about being a dad and kid chauffeur. Likewise, I followed the two creators of Twitter, Jack Dorsey, and Biz Stone, because I figured they could give me some hint of how this Twitter thing is really supposed to work. It still feels like speaking a foreign language to me.

From the tcot list, I found some interesting conservative celebrities, like Gov. Mike Huckabee, Dick Armey, Newt Gingrich, and Karl Rove. I felt a rush of adrenaline when Karl Rove started following MY updates. Heady stuff, this Twitter. I must've gotten a bit carried away with all the celebrity following, or perhaps I just thought it was a Pepsi logo, but I clicked on "Follow" Barack Obama. A couple hours later, I had second thoughts and decided to "unfollow" him, but only after BO had started following me! Hmmm...maybe he'll learn something from my pithy political commentary. (Dream on...)

I gotta go now...Pope Benedict is following me and he just asked what #tcot means.

You can follow my twitterings at http://twitter.com/militantmom.

Happy Birthday, Paul!

Happy ninth birthday, Paul!

Happy Feast of the Conversion of St. Paul!

Love,

Mom

Today is the Feast of St. Francis de Sales

Today is a special day. Not only did my #4 daughter receive a full tuition scholarship offer from one of her top choice colleges today, it is also the 21st anniversary of my being received into the Catholic Church.

Coincidentally, (or perhaps Providentially), it is also the feast of St. Francis de Sales, patron saint of writers.

The college that made the scholarship offer is De Sales University.

St. Francis de Sales was named bishop of Geneva in 1602, and worked tirelessly for the conversion of souls, particularly those who had become Calvinists. He is credited with converting many of the population to the Catholic faith.

The first church I ever attended (that I have memory of), was a Presbyterian church. I still have the Bible I received from them when I was 9 years old and for many years I read it and prayed to God to show me the way.

On January 24, 1988, my first child was baptized and I was also received into the Catholic Church. I can't help but think St. Francis de Sales must've been praying for me.