Adoption is Plan B

Let’s be clear about one thing: adoption never was God’s plan.

That’s a pretty bold statement from someone who claims to be a Christian. After all, isn’t the Bible full of references to being “adopted sons and daughters of God”? What about Moses being adopted by Pharaoh? And wasn’t Jesus adopted by Joseph, Mary’s husband? It seems like adoption figures pretty prominently in both the Old and New Testaments of the Bible.

So, yeah, maybe God did use adoption to further his plan for humanity. But adoption is a result of our fallen human nature. If it weren’t for our brokenness, we wouldn’t need adoption.

Now I’m going to make another bold statement: The best way to raise a child is to have an intact biological two-parent family. Yes, despite what you may have heard from the popular media, kids still do best when they are raised with their biological mom and dad. Poverty stinks, but it’s still better to be poor with both your mom and dad, than to be rich without them. And I suspect growing up with at least one biological parent is still better than none. Unfortunately, life doesn’t always work out that way for kids.

As my husband and I stand on the brink of adopting again in our 50’s, I find myself reflecting on life in a way that I never did when I was in my 20’s and 30’s having babies, or in my 40’s traveling to another country to adopt two orphans.

A Baby Changes Everything

A new baby is expected in our family.

No, for once it's not me who's pregnant.

Our oldest daughter and her husband recently announced they were expecting their first child around Thanksgiving time. We were asked not to say anything for a few weeks because they wanted to be the ones to tell family and friends so that folks didn't end up hearing about it via Facebook. That's a problem we didn't have when I was last expecting.

So, I kept my mouth shut and contemplated all these things in my heart, which was difficult, but good.

I realized that a baby really does impact a lot of people. Besides the fact that I'm going to be a grandma and my husband will be a grandpa for the first time, there are all the excited siblings who will be aunts and uncles for the first time--twelve of them on both sides! Plus, there's another set of excited first time grandparents and several sets of excited first time great-grandparents. (That's what can happen when two first-borns get married). Then there are the excited great aunts, great uncles, second cousins and at least one step great-great-grandma. Yep, there are a whole lot of people looking forward to this kid's arrival; not to mention his or her mom and dad.

A baby changes everything.